When a dear friend moves away for the 30th time.. Here's how I feel.

Here's a poem I wrote from the brokeness of long distance relationships and how hard they are.

But before you go:
I want you to know.
The waters are raging deep
The tide is oh so high
The weight of this is risky
But you were willing to stay by my side

Through my masquerades and silence
My performances went well
Against you, I built a fence
Because I was scared to show you just how I felt

You know that I want to swim to safety
As the storms pull me in
My blind eyes can't see anything
But you still fought with me; my friend

Though my guard continues to stay up
You still see straight through me
And when it all becomes too much
More than some beautiful mess is what you see

I'm strong enough all by myself
Or at least I seem to think I am
I never wanted to need some one else
Pride tends to leave the light of my heart, dim

But now your becoming so close
And my walls are falling down
I can't take to see where this may go
Life is so safe for me when no one's around

So here I go
As it all becomes to unravel
It's no longer a show
And the angry waters begin to become leveled

You have now seen the other side of life through my eyes
and sorry is all I could say
You were not surprised
While others wanted justice
You just gave me time, love, and grace

I let you in a little more
And suddenly, I don't feel so trapped
I maybe, am starting to see the shore
As all my secrets start to become unwrapped


Your so kind, so nice
It's so hard to believe
I'm letting some one help fight this fight
But in the back of my mind I wonder if I'm being deceived

I'm honest and tell you I don't believe you care
Maybe your just one of "them"
But you assure me, for me you want to be there
And remind me I'm so much more than who I think I am

You see how I feel things more intense
Sometimes emotions hidden too deep
And when this life did not make any sense
You didn't set me up to fake such strength when I was oh so weak

God sent you to tell me
This is the way through the cloudy skies, I'll walk you through
But I'm afraid to lift my head up and see
It just seems too good to be true

But I take the risk
As I begin to finally listen to you, and follow
It doesn't make sense -You understand. You want to help, you insist
Because my burdens are too much or just me to hold.

Little by little I hear myself speak and my silence disappears
I think I can finally smile and mean it now
I'm not immersed by the tears
And the cloudy skies are becoming clear somehow

I feel the weight of the world start to lift
There's a natural high, I'm happy
It's a feeling that I've missed


But then you start to share with me a secret of your own
You hate that you have so little time
And break it to me that soon you must go
Soon you will have a new home


So I want you to know before you leave
Your still a true friend
No matter the distance
You will always be
That friend that fought to be let in
When the rest of the world turned it's back on me

Your going to be so far away
But there's an ongoing impact in my heart
Though it'd be so nice for you to stay
Life has a mind of it's own So we must now depart